Assalamualaikum, salam sejahtera :)
My friend told me about this challenge and I thought of taking up this challenge for fun. I think it'll help sharpen my drawing skill. or probably not. Whatever, just for fun :B
Day :
1. Yourself
2. Where you are right now
3. An animal using a form of transportation
4. Favourite movie character
5. A 3 scene comic
6. Kittens!
7. your perfect summer day
8. Something blue
9. ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE!
10. Your favourite t-shirt
11. Dream car
12. Free day! Draw what you like!
13. Mmmm, cake.
14. A drawing to represent your favourite song.
15. Monsters!
16. A character for a new cartoon show
17. A place you want to go
18. I love lamp
19. Stick figures in peril
20. Alien invasion!
21. A mythical character
22. Something you don’t like
23. Free day again!
24. Dinosaurs!
25. The first thing that comes to your mind, no cheating
26. A logo for your own business
27. Draw yourself as a member of the opposite sex
28. Pockets! Draw their contents.
29. Farm animals dressed for work
30. A congratulations to yourself for actually doing this!
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
PRELIMINARY NATCOMP 2012
Assalamualaikum, salam sejahtera :D
Alhamdulillah, today was the best day ever ! We won FIRST PLACE for division B and BRONZE for the state of Selangor. And an added bonus, our drum major Abang Faddil got the BEST DRUM MAJOR AWARD followed by our band majorette Kak Neesa with the BEST CONDUCTOR AWARD. A round of applause for them and CONGRATULATIONS ! :D and THANK YOU to all the parents, teachers, our instructor, alumni, ex-seniors and schoolmates that came to support us during our performance. It really did help boost our confidence level. My burnt skin was worth this results lol~
The NATCOMP was held at SMK USJ 23. I've been there before this year for olahraga competition and I really didn't want to go there again, bad memories =_= Didn't expect to be there again and create another whole new memory. A memory which I'll be telling to my children, grand children, grand grand grand children and so on :B So my day started off at 3.45 a.m., I woke up and got ready to head to school by 5 a.m.. The bus arrived at 6.15 a.m. and we went to the venue after packing up our instruments and taking a seat in the bus. The ride wasn't long, maybe around 20 to 25 minutes or maybe less. I was too drowsy to focus on the time this morning. I kept quiet throughout the whole bus ride, was remembering my fingerings for the songs and the visuals. By the time we reached there, my tummy started to cramp. It needed the freaking toilet. Of all the time man ! Mysteries of the human body :B That's when I needed to use my mental work, I hypnotized myself to think that I don't need to go to the toilet and poop. It worked the whole day until I reached back home lol XD We had our warm up with our instruments, did some breathing exercises and rest before it was our time to perform. I was so kayu and tense during the waiting period. But normal-lah tu~
Our performance was after the 15 minute break, so we headed to the tent to get ready. Emotions were running high at that time-some of us cried, some tense, some keeping to themselves. Then our ex-seniors stepped in and helped us by doing the breath-in-breath-out exercise and gave some encouraging advice. One thing for sure is to HAVE FUN DURING OUR PERFORMANCE :) and we did. We went all out and gave our best. Although there was some mishap and incidents, we went on with our performance till the end. I still remember my mistakes so vividly =_= one thing for sure, I wasn't happy with my solo part. okay, FULL STOP there with the bad memory part. During P.Ramlee Medley, I went all out and joget XD release your inner poyo-ness lol~ Overall, the performance felt like our last practice and not an intense competition mode performance. So I was a bit concerned and relax about it. After our performance, we sat down and watched High School Klang's performance. Memang perghh, cat got my tongue moments. They were the last to perform and after that the result moment and after that PHOTO SHOOT ! Everyone was camwhore-ing each other haha XD including myself lalalalala~
So that's how we end our victorious day. I want to go into more details but I'm already feeling sleepy again. Goodnight !
SSAAS BAND STRIVING FOR VICTORY !
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Alhamdulillah, today was the best day ever ! We won FIRST PLACE for division B and BRONZE for the state of Selangor. And an added bonus, our drum major Abang Faddil got the BEST DRUM MAJOR AWARD followed by our band majorette Kak Neesa with the BEST CONDUCTOR AWARD. A round of applause for them and CONGRATULATIONS ! :D and THANK YOU to all the parents, teachers, our instructor, alumni, ex-seniors and schoolmates that came to support us during our performance. It really did help boost our confidence level. My burnt skin was worth this results lol~
The NATCOMP was held at SMK USJ 23. I've been there before this year for olahraga competition and I really didn't want to go there again, bad memories =_= Didn't expect to be there again and create another whole new memory. A memory which I'll be telling to my children, grand children, grand grand grand children and so on :B So my day started off at 3.45 a.m., I woke up and got ready to head to school by 5 a.m.. The bus arrived at 6.15 a.m. and we went to the venue after packing up our instruments and taking a seat in the bus. The ride wasn't long, maybe around 20 to 25 minutes or maybe less. I was too drowsy to focus on the time this morning. I kept quiet throughout the whole bus ride, was remembering my fingerings for the songs and the visuals. By the time we reached there, my tummy started to cramp. It needed the freaking toilet. Of all the time man ! Mysteries of the human body :B That's when I needed to use my mental work, I hypnotized myself to think that I don't need to go to the toilet and poop. It worked the whole day until I reached back home lol XD We had our warm up with our instruments, did some breathing exercises and rest before it was our time to perform. I was so kayu and tense during the waiting period. But normal-lah tu~
Our performance was after the 15 minute break, so we headed to the tent to get ready. Emotions were running high at that time-some of us cried, some tense, some keeping to themselves. Then our ex-seniors stepped in and helped us by doing the breath-in-breath-out exercise and gave some encouraging advice. One thing for sure is to HAVE FUN DURING OUR PERFORMANCE :) and we did. We went all out and gave our best. Although there was some mishap and incidents, we went on with our performance till the end. I still remember my mistakes so vividly =_= one thing for sure, I wasn't happy with my solo part. okay, FULL STOP there with the bad memory part. During P.Ramlee Medley, I went all out and joget XD release your inner poyo-ness lol~ Overall, the performance felt like our last practice and not an intense competition mode performance. So I was a bit concerned and relax about it. After our performance, we sat down and watched High School Klang's performance. Memang perghh, cat got my tongue moments. They were the last to perform and after that the result moment and after that PHOTO SHOOT ! Everyone was camwhore-ing each other haha XD including myself lalalalala~
So that's how we end our victorious day. I want to go into more details but I'm already feeling sleepy again. Goodnight !
SSAAS BAND STRIVING FOR VICTORY !
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Beginning
Assalamualaikum, salam sejahtera :)
Listening to A Thousand Miles - Vanessa Carlton (Boyce Avenue feat. Alex Goot acoustic cover) right now. Thinking of someone perhaps? You're choice to decide :)
So today was the first intensive band training. I have to say, as tired as I was, I'm still happy and looking forward to it tomorrow. Maybe because it was what someone said to me? Maybe because it was fun spending time with my band mates? Maybe because of the adrenaline rush that I had earlier? Whatever the reason was, I think now I know why band means everything to oneself. I'm starting to enjoy myself a little. I think I'm getting a glimpse of what my brain wants for a reason. Are you agreeing with me now, brain?
And I should start to learn how to communicate and socialize. Because today, as I was on my way to keep my eupho and then pray solat Asar, I realized I was the first one to reach the room and there was no one behind me. I saw the word AWKWARD spelling in front of my eyes and hitting directly into my face. One of my embarrassing moments and must-erase-from-memory scene. Gaahhh, someone lend me a book for dummies on conversation D:
-I normally converse through writings and thoughts-
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Listening to A Thousand Miles - Vanessa Carlton (Boyce Avenue feat. Alex Goot acoustic cover) right now. Thinking of someone perhaps? You're choice to decide :)
So today was the first intensive band training. I have to say, as tired as I was, I'm still happy and looking forward to it tomorrow. Maybe because it was what someone said to me? Maybe because it was fun spending time with my band mates? Maybe because of the adrenaline rush that I had earlier? Whatever the reason was, I think now I know why band means everything to oneself. I'm starting to enjoy myself a little. I think I'm getting a glimpse of what my brain wants for a reason. Are you agreeing with me now, brain?
And I should start to learn how to communicate and socialize. Because today, as I was on my way to keep my eupho and then pray solat Asar, I realized I was the first one to reach the room and there was no one behind me. I saw the word AWKWARD spelling in front of my eyes and hitting directly into my face. One of my embarrassing moments and must-erase-from-memory scene. Gaahhh, someone lend me a book for dummies on conversation D:
-I normally converse through writings and thoughts-
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Care
Assalamualaikum, salam sejahtera.
It's been a while since I blog about anything. Busy with band practice lately, comp just two weeks ahead. I'm dead nervous and excited >< I have to improve on my play + kawad skills. Got to drill myself to the max !
Since I've been busy with band, I've been so caught up with my own world that I neglected the world around me. I want to keep a connection with everyone but my body is just too tattered to accept all the hellos and smiles. My brain feels like it's engulfing itself just to keep my body functioning.
I've been hearing stories buzzing around about myself. You know how the wind carries truth and lies about oneself. And it all ended up spilling in front of me during dinner on Friday night. My mom picked us (me and my sister) up from school - I was out late again from band practice, so glad I wasn't rifled with the nagging. Once at home, we had dinner and I opened up about my sister's teacher saying she was a bit lazy in class. Then my sister went all touchy and said she listened in class, sent in all the teacher's homeworks, etc. Just to get even with myself and make myself feel the same pain, she said with a loud and clear voice - "Cikgu kata kaklong terlalu rajin sampai tak kisah pasal orang lain". Talk about adding fuel to the fire. DO YOU THINK I DON'T REALIZE THAT IMPERFECTION ABOUT MYSELF, YOU LITTLE WORM? And then my mom comes in and added more to her statement. This is when all the stories comes in, "Kawan adik kata kaklong tak senyum langsung bila bercakap. Pandang orang pun tak senyum." "Kaklong ni terlalu rajin sampai lupa pasal orang lain." . And I still remember a classmate of mine said - "You smiled !". Was I that serious looking? Did I not smile that much?
I'm not a socializer, ever since primary school. I started feeling insecure when people judge me by the looks, so I always hide behind my achievements. I was never confident about myself and started hating my own capabilities until now. Everything that I do is not good enough. I should at least give a pat in the back for my effort but I always end up punishing myself for the little mistakes I made. There's always this choking feeling in my throat, it's like I'm suffocating. At the end of the day, I always judge myself. Was I performing at my best today or was I still lousy?
To my friends, I'm sorry if I was ever so inconsiderate and unobservant. I'm sorry that I didn't make the effort to understand your pain and enjoy your achievements. I'm sorry that I ever made you feel like I'm your friend and abandon you alone with only consolations as company. I'm sorry that I half-heartily listened to what you said. I want to care about your feelings, your opinions, your life. But I don't know how to actually show it. I always end up keeping it to myself and running away. I want you to know, I care about you. And I hope that you too can feel that I care about you even if it is just a small dot.
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
It's been a while since I blog about anything. Busy with band practice lately, comp just two weeks ahead. I'm dead nervous and excited >< I have to improve on my play + kawad skills. Got to drill myself to the max !
Since I've been busy with band, I've been so caught up with my own world that I neglected the world around me. I want to keep a connection with everyone but my body is just too tattered to accept all the hellos and smiles. My brain feels like it's engulfing itself just to keep my body functioning.
I've been hearing stories buzzing around about myself. You know how the wind carries truth and lies about oneself. And it all ended up spilling in front of me during dinner on Friday night. My mom picked us (me and my sister) up from school - I was out late again from band practice, so glad I wasn't rifled with the nagging. Once at home, we had dinner and I opened up about my sister's teacher saying she was a bit lazy in class. Then my sister went all touchy and said she listened in class, sent in all the teacher's homeworks, etc. Just to get even with myself and make myself feel the same pain, she said with a loud and clear voice - "Cikgu kata kaklong terlalu rajin sampai tak kisah pasal orang lain". Talk about adding fuel to the fire. DO YOU THINK I DON'T REALIZE THAT IMPERFECTION ABOUT MYSELF, YOU LITTLE WORM? And then my mom comes in and added more to her statement. This is when all the stories comes in, "Kawan adik kata kaklong tak senyum langsung bila bercakap. Pandang orang pun tak senyum." "Kaklong ni terlalu rajin sampai lupa pasal orang lain." . And I still remember a classmate of mine said - "You smiled !". Was I that serious looking? Did I not smile that much?
I'm not a socializer, ever since primary school. I started feeling insecure when people judge me by the looks, so I always hide behind my achievements. I was never confident about myself and started hating my own capabilities until now. Everything that I do is not good enough. I should at least give a pat in the back for my effort but I always end up punishing myself for the little mistakes I made. There's always this choking feeling in my throat, it's like I'm suffocating. At the end of the day, I always judge myself. Was I performing at my best today or was I still lousy?
To my friends, I'm sorry if I was ever so inconsiderate and unobservant. I'm sorry that I didn't make the effort to understand your pain and enjoy your achievements. I'm sorry that I ever made you feel like I'm your friend and abandon you alone with only consolations as company. I'm sorry that I half-heartily listened to what you said. I want to care about your feelings, your opinions, your life. But I don't know how to actually show it. I always end up keeping it to myself and running away. I want you to know, I care about you. And I hope that you too can feel that I care about you even if it is just a small dot.
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Advice
Assalamualaikum, salam sejahtera.
Have you read my older post? The Emotions blog post. Well, I guess this would be the continuation.
I was on my way to band practice as usual, with a slight panicky feeling because I overslept and came late. But nothing was out of the ordinary, so I went to take my eupho and did some buzzing exercises. Then we had sectionals and practiced songs for the upcoming nat comp. The songs were new to me and thus making it a new challenge for me to overcome. There were some tricky parts, especially the part where I had to buzz the D high note. I couldn't reach it ! Some pathetic junior I am. So I tried buzzing it a couple of times but my lips weren't into playing today. So I was left with just memorizing the fingerings for the songs and getting the rhythm right. And I want to apologize and thank my senior. He was ever so patient playing alone, knowing that this junior is slow in picking up new songs. Were you annoyed to have a junior like me?
After practice, we hanged out at the usual spot. Everyone was chit chatting away while I was sitting alone, staring blankly at the open school compound. Depression, guilt and stupidity hit me at the same time. I was thinking back about today's practice and was torturing myself with all those feelings. Then I asked my friend a question. The same question that I asked myself, why did you enter band? And her answer was always the same, because band is discipline and she wants to create a memorable high school experience. So I told her what was playing on my mind. And she said this to me :
"You're already half way through. Why not go for it and give a 100% rather than quitting and returning back to 0%?"
I was speechless. What she said is true. So far, I've managed to play some songs and have learned more about music besides during my violin class. I met new friends and experience new things everyday. But then again, I said to her, what is my reason? She said no matter what the reason is, just do it. You're already half way, why go back and start all over? And then she left, leaving me to my own thoughts.
So now, I am still questioning myself. Why am I burdening myself with this unnecessary question? I think my reason was pretty clear up until now but my mind keeps rejecting it and saying that it is a lousy reason.
-Why can't I be honest with myself?-
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Have you read my older post? The Emotions blog post. Well, I guess this would be the continuation.
I was on my way to band practice as usual, with a slight panicky feeling because I overslept and came late. But nothing was out of the ordinary, so I went to take my eupho and did some buzzing exercises. Then we had sectionals and practiced songs for the upcoming nat comp. The songs were new to me and thus making it a new challenge for me to overcome. There were some tricky parts, especially the part where I had to buzz the D high note. I couldn't reach it ! Some pathetic junior I am. So I tried buzzing it a couple of times but my lips weren't into playing today. So I was left with just memorizing the fingerings for the songs and getting the rhythm right. And I want to apologize and thank my senior. He was ever so patient playing alone, knowing that this junior is slow in picking up new songs. Were you annoyed to have a junior like me?
After practice, we hanged out at the usual spot. Everyone was chit chatting away while I was sitting alone, staring blankly at the open school compound. Depression, guilt and stupidity hit me at the same time. I was thinking back about today's practice and was torturing myself with all those feelings. Then I asked my friend a question. The same question that I asked myself, why did you enter band? And her answer was always the same, because band is discipline and she wants to create a memorable high school experience. So I told her what was playing on my mind. And she said this to me :
"You're already half way through. Why not go for it and give a 100% rather than quitting and returning back to 0%?"
I was speechless. What she said is true. So far, I've managed to play some songs and have learned more about music besides during my violin class. I met new friends and experience new things everyday. But then again, I said to her, what is my reason? She said no matter what the reason is, just do it. You're already half way, why go back and start all over? And then she left, leaving me to my own thoughts.
So now, I am still questioning myself. Why am I burdening myself with this unnecessary question? I think my reason was pretty clear up until now but my mind keeps rejecting it and saying that it is a lousy reason.
-Why can't I be honest with myself?-
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Emotions
Assalamualaikum, salam sejahtera
Originally, I didn't feel like writing tonight but I somehow had to let out my thoughts. Things have changed drastically for me this year. From school to friends to parents and myself. During those periods and right now, I'm having mixed emotions and thoughts. It's like I'm being slit by the throat.
Almost everyone asked, why did I join band? My friend would say because band has discipline and is awesome. But for me, truthfully I don't know why. I'm at a lost for words when they attack me with that question. And the only reply I can give is "adalah" or just smile back guiltily at them. Did I make the wrong decision? Was I too rash in letting go of PBSM before? Why am I so slow in picking up new things in band practices? Why am I joining band in the first place? WHY AM I ASKING MYSELF FOR REASONS?
I know this suffocating feeling, it means that I'm lying to myself. Lying so that I can make others feel happy. A good cause but I'm ruining myself. Sound self-centered? I know. But I've been doing this to myself often and it's getting worst by the minute. I want to make others feel proud of me but I'm not into the thing that I'm doing, I'm not enjoying it. Why am I not honest to myself? What do I really want actually? I don't even know what I want already. I feel like I'M A COMPLETE FAILURE. Why was I picked to be born?
Reading all those mangas and watching dramas, they're all lies that can never survive in the real world. For example, I watched Dream High 2 and JB said "I like you. Why? No reason.". How can you be sure you have no reason you like her? or why you like singing and dancing? Give me an answer. But I know it'll end up being NO REASON. How can someone have that strong of a passion and determination to like or even love something so strongly? I don't understand. My friends all have something that they're passionate about but me? I'm just lost. I don't know what I like, what I want, WHAT MY PASSION IS?.
It's torturing not to know what my own heart is saying. I tried once listening to my own heartbeat, lying down and breathing deeply. But I end up hearing voices of old memories, drumming against my eardrum and killing the sound of my heartbeat. What will I end up being into?
Why are there a lot of unanswered questions in my head?
Please help me.
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
Originally, I didn't feel like writing tonight but I somehow had to let out my thoughts. Things have changed drastically for me this year. From school to friends to parents and myself. During those periods and right now, I'm having mixed emotions and thoughts. It's like I'm being slit by the throat.
Almost everyone asked, why did I join band? My friend would say because band has discipline and is awesome. But for me, truthfully I don't know why. I'm at a lost for words when they attack me with that question. And the only reply I can give is "adalah" or just smile back guiltily at them. Did I make the wrong decision? Was I too rash in letting go of PBSM before? Why am I so slow in picking up new things in band practices? Why am I joining band in the first place? WHY AM I ASKING MYSELF FOR REASONS?
I know this suffocating feeling, it means that I'm lying to myself. Lying so that I can make others feel happy. A good cause but I'm ruining myself. Sound self-centered? I know. But I've been doing this to myself often and it's getting worst by the minute. I want to make others feel proud of me but I'm not into the thing that I'm doing, I'm not enjoying it. Why am I not honest to myself? What do I really want actually? I don't even know what I want already. I feel like I'M A COMPLETE FAILURE. Why was I picked to be born?
Reading all those mangas and watching dramas, they're all lies that can never survive in the real world. For example, I watched Dream High 2 and JB said "I like you. Why? No reason.". How can you be sure you have no reason you like her? or why you like singing and dancing? Give me an answer. But I know it'll end up being NO REASON. How can someone have that strong of a passion and determination to like or even love something so strongly? I don't understand. My friends all have something that they're passionate about but me? I'm just lost. I don't know what I like, what I want, WHAT MY PASSION IS?.
It's torturing not to know what my own heart is saying. I tried once listening to my own heartbeat, lying down and breathing deeply. But I end up hearing voices of old memories, drumming against my eardrum and killing the sound of my heartbeat. What will I end up being into?
Why are there a lot of unanswered questions in my head?
Please help me.
Nadia Kiyoshi ♥
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